i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
