i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.