I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
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