thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize