im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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