She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize
