69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Watching her eat just hurts me
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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