just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
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