brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
