i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
