whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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