i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
