She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
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P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
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We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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