Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
