TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
