Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
