dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
