Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
