so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize