just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize