i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
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I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
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Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway