Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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