Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
