I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
