question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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