I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
