Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
