I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Who died my cat blue again?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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