oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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