Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I wish life had little blips of pornography
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
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