I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize