In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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