he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
i think im in europe. pls send help
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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