why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
