Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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