Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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