I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i came on her dog
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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