i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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