i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
