He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
two words: eviction party
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize