We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Actions speak louder than pants.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
