You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
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just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
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Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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