Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
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