He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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