Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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