Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
