can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
