But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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