We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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