Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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