it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I wish i was in the wii world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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