He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize