let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
